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They will put forth tremendous amounts of effort to accomplish goals which are important to them.


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If healthy relationships are among these goals, you can bet that the ISTJ will do everything that they can to foster and maintain healthy relationships. ISTJ Strengths Honor their commitments Take their relationship roles very seriously Usually able to communicate what's on their minds with precision Good listeners Extremely good albeit conservative with money Able to take constructive criticism well Able to tolerate conflict situations without emotional upheaval Able to dole out punishment or criticism when called for ISTJ Weaknesses Tendency to believe that they're always right Tendency to get involved in "win-lose" conversations Not naturally in-tune with what others are feeling Their value for structure may seem rigid to others Not likely to give enough praise or affirmation to their loved ones ISTJs as Lovers "To love means to open ourselves to the negative as well as the positive - to grief, sorrow, and disappointment as well as to joy, fulfillment, and an intensity of consciousness we did not know was possible before.

Once they have made a commitment to a relationship, they will stick with it until the end. They gladly accept their duty towards fulfilling their role in the relationship.

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ISTJs are generally willing and able to do anything which they have defined as a goal. So, if maintaining a good relationship is important to the ISTJ, they are likely to have a good relationship. If they have not added this goal to their internal "list" of duties, they are likely to approach the relationship in their "natural" state, which is extremely practical, traditional, and structured.

Sexually, the ISTJ is likely to approach intimacy from a physical perspective, rather than as a means of expressing love and affection. They usually have a problem expressing their deepest feelings, even though they may be very strongly felt. They will expect sex on a relatively scheduled basis, and are likely to honor traditions regarding gender role-playing.

ISTJ Weaknesses

Male ISTJs will assert their perspective on their partners, while female ISTJs will tend to follow along with what their male counterparts want although they will be uncomfortable with anything extremely out of the traditional norm. ISTJs do not feel threatened by constructive criticism or conflict situations. When faced with criticism, the ISTJ is likely to believe that their point of view is correct. They have a tremendous amount of respect for Facts, and base their opinions on known facts and logic.

MBTI ISTJ Dating and Intimacy

Consequently, they have a hard time seeing the viability of viewpoints which don't match their own. When the ISTJ gets involved in a disagreement over a point, they usually begin to attempt to recruit the other person over to their own point of view, fully believing that they are right, and that the other individual simply needs to understand the facts of the situation. In such situations, the ISTJ may or may not be right, but their confidence in their own "rightness" can shake the confidence of others involved.

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This habit can quickly turn conversations into "win-lose" situations, and can present a special problem in intimate relationships. While they may inadvertantly shake the confidence of their colleagues with their "I'm right" approach, the same behavior may cause serious issues within their intimate relationships. The ISTJ's constant assertion of "rightness" may send a message to their mates that they do not value their opinions.

If the ISTJ has a mate with a strong Feeling preference, they may inadvertantly wreak havoc with their self-esteem, since Feeling individuals are extremely sensitive to conflict and criticism, and are especially vulnerable in their intimate relationships. Since ISTJs make decisions using the Thinking function rather than Feeling , they are not naturally likely to consider their mates feelings and emotions in daily living.

ISTJ Relationships

This may be a problem if their mates have the Feeling preference, since Feeling individuals usually expect a lot of positive affirmation, which the ISTJ does not naturally communicate to them. ISTJs are generally very capable and efficient at most things which they endeavor. Consequently, their mates are likely to hold a good amount of respect for them. Daily concerns are likely to be well-provided for by the ISTJ. If other concerns, such as emotional needs, are pointed out to the ISTJ as important issues for their mates, the ISTJ will rise to the occasion and add the task of addressing these needs to the internal "list" of duties.

Since the ISTJ is so willing to work hard at issues, and so tireless at performing tasks which they feel should be done, the ISTJ generally makes a wonderful, caring mate who is willing and able to promote a healthy, lasting relationship which is also a partnership. How did we arrive at this? Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness; For even as He loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable.

Fe also conveys an air of warmth and friendliness, giving the impression that ITPs are, at least to some extent, emotionally open. Thus, in the INTP we find an individual who loves talking about relationships and other human concerns, yet who is in actuality quite emotionally green remember, Fe is their inferior function. So although INTPs may be viewed as generally affable and well-intentioned, they are usually unaware of the degree to which they are seen especially by NF types as emotionally short-handed.

ISTPs, by contrast, are less eager to discuss their feelings, instead preferring a more cool or stoic approach to emotional matters. Despite this, the introverted nature of Fi renders ITJs less emotionally expressive than ITPs, which is why many ITJs are perceived as emotionally cold and aloof this is one reason so many voters struggled with Hillary Clinton. Indeed, it is Te that contributes to perceptions of ITJs as robotic or unemotional. Consequently, relationships are often quite difficult for INTJs and ISTJs alike, especially when paired with Fe types who seek external proof of, or want to dialogue about, emotional matters.

While ITPs may at times suffer the same fate, their use of Fe makes them somewhat more skillful and at home in social contexts. All the IT types can be disposed to nerdiness and social awkwardness.

INTJ & ISTJ Types in Relationships

Whether we like it or not, these demographics affect our social expectations and perceptions of the respective types and sexes. In light of this multiplex of factors, I think we are mistaken when we assume that all nerds have essentially the same personality type and are faced with the same social or relational hurdles. To the contrary, each of the above types has its own set of strengths and challenges. The 16 Personality Types: Thanks for your comment. We feel this discrepancy has resulted from mistyping, especially with respect to the J-P variable. If we are correct in our assertion that FPs and TJs are the most common types among American women, then we would also be justified in suggesting that American women predominantly use Fi in combination with Te both FPs and TJs use the Fi-Te function pair.

In similar fashion, we see a preponderance of TP types among American men, which would indicate a predominant preference for Ti in combination with Fe.


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This post is the best! I think the Ne plays a part as well, so that an INTP female is no longer seen as an absent-minded professor, but as air-headed.