He has about a fifth grade education and zero plans to improve himself. He has a baby with another woman who he never sees and never tries to. He has a drinking and gambling problem. He insists on living in the [crummiest], most dangerous part of town, even though they've dealt with several break-ins and they could live closer to her parents for less than they pay now.
What To Do When Your Friend Is Dating An Asshole | www.perfectpostage.com
Speaking of them, they're basically raising his baby because she works and he just stays out as much as possible. I figured they wouldn't last a year, but now I fear she'll never leave him and the kid is going to turn out super [messed] up. The guy's got four cardboard cutouts of himself in his house. He made his own CD about how to be a business man and gives everyone unwanted signed copies. He compares her to all his old girlfriends constantly in front of her friends and family and constantly puts her down. None of us in the friend group want to hang out with her anymore because he just polices the situation and insults us.
My best friend and I met through our boyfriends. One weekend we went on a girls' trip — just the two of us, to my parent's holiday house.
Our plans were to go hiking and chill out on our own, however he called her two days in and started verbally abusing her for no reason and was yelling that he was going to drive the kms and pick her up. She calmed him down and I drove her home so that she could break up with him. So fast forward three months, we went out to the local bars and he was going to come later and pick her up when she was ready. My boyfriend was there with us because he was my designated driver so he was making sure we were safe — not that we needed it.
About two hours into the night her bf came into one of the bars and demanded she go home with him. He got quite abusive and despite me trying to get her to come home with me she went home with him. She's still with him and they're now house hunting. He cheated on her multiple times.
He was emotionally and physically abusive and he slowly turned her into an insecure, crazy [person]. She once slapped me because we were in a club and he said something to me and I responded, but because it was loud I had to talk in his ear and she thought I kissed him?!!? She moved countries for him, allowed him to live rent-free while doing nothing meanwhile she was working two jobs to support them. He'd break [stuff] in the house whenever they got in a fight. He brought girls back to her place and [had sex with] them in her bed and sent her pictures while she was at work.
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- 18 Things That Happen When Your BFF Is Dating A Jerk.
They got pregnant and she got an abortion but he didn't go with her or support her emotionally or financially. After the abortion when they'd fight, he'd tell her she was a murderer and killed his baby. He met her at a Walmart.
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This girl was a hypocrite if there ever was one. Holier than thou and judgmental but also trying to get knocked up at 16 by anyone she could proposition, including his friends and my brother. She was also a control freak, jealous, you know the drill. We begged and begged him to get far, far away from her.
Who wants their friend to be a teen dad and tied to a loony forever? The best we could get from him was that he promised not to get her pregnant. She was pregnant within a year and they got married. Had two more kids but finally broke up a few years ago. She lives with another guy and had that guy's baby but my friend just won't file the papers.
2. It hurts to watch our friends get walked all over.
And she won't either because of a bull law that requires him to pay for a baby that isn't his, because they're married and the law says it is even if genetics say otherwise. It's both sad and frustrating. We had one friend in our group, who was this introverted but sweet guy. He hooked up with a girl we called "the troll. She was also cutting him off from his friends, especially female ones. They're married with twins now, and none of our friend group are in contact with him anymore.
Last I saw him was his engagement party. I had one of those friends back in high school. She and this other kid started dating all lovey-dovey for a while, but after a bit she completely shut down to all of us, it was like something inside of her died. She started saying how she wanted out of the relationship and how she couldn't stand him anymore, but for some reason she just never broke up with him.
He got worse and worse with her over time, started hitting her and threatening her. Eventually her parents and the police got involved and they 'broke up' for like a month or two, but then they just got back together. From then on, she weirdly seemed to bounce back and forth between being super in love with him and happy that they're together, to looking all dead inside and seeming unable to stand him and it just went on like that — he'd go too far, they'd break up for a bit and then get back together again over and over.
We all tried to talk some sense into her, but she'd get angry at everyone, telling us it's none of our business and we should stay out of her life. I think her best friend got so frustrated with her over that, that she completely cut her out because she couldn't talk sense into her or help her but she also couldn't stand to watch it go on. We lost touch pretty quick after high school, so I don't really know how she ended up. I want to believe everything turned out alright, but it's so easy to see a scenario where she ended up marrying that guy out of high school and spent the rest of her life miserable and trapped with him.
They got together and she immediately took over his house which she began referring to as "her" house. He would come home and find out that she had her father over and they two would actually remodel portions of the house without even letting him know. Dude was a commercial artist. Then, apparently, realized that there were no ducts for the dryer and they needed some outlets installed so she called him at work PISSED that his house "sucked" and he needed to get an electrician over there ASAP to fix this, which he did paying the emergency rate.
Was hoping he'd see the light. When they let you down for the 23rd time this month, their withdrawal hits you right in the gut. Your emotions, thoughts and feelings hinge on their actions in an unhealthy way. One night they may stand you up completely and text you the next day happily like nothing happened. You might have no luck getting a response one day, but the next they are completely on top of the communication. They have a hard time making time for you.
When the other person goes hot and cold, your emotions cycle from downright bliss to abject depression. You might not even know what their standards ARE, but it feels like whatever you do is wrong. They are critical of efforts that you make even in good faith. The relationship feels difficult. They make mean jokes at your expense.
18 Things That Happen When Your BFF Is Dating A Jerk
Even worse, they accuse you of being the sensitive one. They may tame it for awhile but over time their disrespect creeps back into your interactions. This post originated on Attract the One. Nothing terrifies me more than being so close to someone and then watching them become a stranger again. Sign up for the Thought Catalog Weekly and get the best stories from the week to your inbox every Friday.