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That pretty much sealed the deal. I mean you went off and went to school and get five years of undergrad so you might have came from money maybe. What I mean is that I could easily have found a way to make you better than me in my head because I was insecure about my height, and my hair, and my wallet. You can join a gym.

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Because what really matters to women is different than what matters to men. Men are totally triggered visually. Okay you need to work on at least confidence. You need to be confident that physical attractiveness is subjective. Man chicks eat that up. So get more confident in who you are, in your game, and just know who you are.

My favorite book on attracting women with honest confidence — Models by Mark Manson. The directness aspect is in regards to stating your intentions.

Dating After College: How to Transition to Dating in the Real World

So if you are talking to a girl at the coffee shop and you like her so you ask her out. Are you free on Thursday? The indirect ask out is you facebook her later or something really weird like that. Are you going to ask her out? Do you like her?

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Congruence is when you ACT out your thoughts. Almost every guy messes this up because this is where indirectness stems from. You see a pretty girl you want to talk to. My name is XYZ. An indirect man will make up some excuse, some lame joke, or something stupid that he think is witty. Congruent guys like a chick and talk to the chick. The follow-through of confidence and directness and that will take you to promise land.

Forget physical attractiveness man. It matters but to an extent. But just like rich guys get chicks and jerks get chicks. Because when you act like a weirdo, when you act out of place, and wacky, people are going to be a lot more self-righteous about bringing you down a peg. So sit your ass in the chair at the coffee shop all damn day and talk to the people that surround you.

People will talk to you. Old guys will talk your ear off. Man I practice what I preach. Old guys will talk your ear off one dude started and told me like for two hours the the good days of real estate for him when he was mogul and somebody and how the stock market screwed him over.

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And that could be anybody. It can be a hot chick, it can be old people, can be a fat chick, it could be a regular Joe. Dating is a numbers game. Meeting girls is a numbers game alright? It is the summation of a million little efforts. Talk to a bunch of chicks. Some are receptive, some are not, and then you gotta close the ones that are. I used to really study this stuff.


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I started the dating game at age 23 myself. So I was in the same boat as you. As long as you go into it with a positive attitude and an open mind, you should be able to handle these little challenges. Be patient and understanding if and when he exposes his baggage. Be on the lookout for guys who want to be independent bachelors and repeat freshman year all over again—one hook-up after the next.

18 People On How Their Dating Life Changed After Graduating College | Thought Catalog

Your dating life will start to feel more real and less like a game. This is music to my ears!

Before you get too excited, remember: Make sure you find someone whose relationship goals align with your own. Try these post-college dating dares to make the most of the new scene and you could find yourself surrounded by cute somethings before you know it! Erica Avesian is a successful young professional in the marketing industry. In her current role, she plans and executes high-end events and marketing projects for a variety of luxury and automotive clients.

When she's not writing, you can find her styling outfits for her best friends, traveling with her family, and hanging out at her happy place, Starbucks. Erica is obsessed with fashion magazines, Disney, and the color pink. In the future Erica would love to start her own online publication or be the next hit talk show host.

So I guess my relationship is with my job, is that sad? In school, there were always girls in my classes that I could get to know and eventually ask out.

Dating: Teens Vs. Adults

Now, my only option really is to ask a stranger for her phone number. For me, college was basically just hooking up with someone and then hanging out with them a few times depending on how great the sex was. Now, dates are more about getting to know each other and looking for a potential relationship.

Just not for me.