All of these back-stories weigh the guys down and jade their view of all future girls. And, yes, I do realize that we girls are just as jaded and corrupted…. With each year, we date more or for some, sleep around more , and with each date or partner , we gain more dating baggage. This baggage gets in the way of future relationships and tarnishes people more and more each time. When we were younger, we were more carefree and definitely weighed a whole lot less without those suitcases filled with sob stories.

Older And Heavier: The Hard Truth About Dating Baggage

It is fun to find all of that stuff out for yourself, but it seems a bit invasive to have so many other people know these favorites before I get to figure them out. How many slivers can a guy give away before he decides that you get the other Who wants a half-heart or a three-quarters heart? The older we are the more we carry, and no matter what dating baggage you bring along, everyone has it; shifting through the shit becomes more tedious. But are my expectations too high and my scale too slight for a guy with so much extra stuff hanging about?

Let's take things to the next level.

How to turn your emotional baggage into dating success

Occasional updates, no BS. No one is perfect in this day and age.

Financial troubles she can get herself out of in time. How much more do you think you'd be hurting her if you rejected her because of it? Quality in a sucessful relationship, would be if the partner was more interested in where you two as a couple were heading into the future, rather than being so wrapped up in what she had to go through in her past.

Some things get better over time and love and trust. If you like her, then support her, rather than running her through your laundry list of reasons why she might be setting off alarms in your head and ditching her just because not "every" possible aspect of her nature is genuinely appealing or convinient to you at the time. I'm not telling you to stay with her and tough it out I would go to great lengths to emphasize NOT to stay with her, if you can't accept her as an entire package.

I'm sure there is someone out there who can and will. When you say "recently" just how recent are you talking? I was a woman with some baggage when I entered my latest relationship but I didn't make it that any of his concern. Those were my issues and because I liked him enough, I didn't want to weigh him down. I wanted him to get to like and know the best part of me. I know we all have our "baggage" of some sort so i don't want to throw her under the bus either.

I would be concerend if it consumes her and the relationship you are trying to start. Everybody has some type of baggage to deal with. You just recently started going out with her so you need to get to know her a little better before giving up. She may or may not be able to handle another relationship right now depending on why she got out of the other relationship I would take it slow, maybe put a time limit on it, like 3 months and go from there. Originally Posted by dixierox. Originally Posted by NooYowkur Like I said I'm torn because I do like her, and part of me thinks she's worth a gamble.

It's only been a few weeks. It's still very very early. I can easily pull away. I have to disagree with the rest of the people here. There is baggage and there is baggage.


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Living with a depressed person is a downer and not worth it. If you were married, that would be different - for better or for worse.


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But why chase trouble. She sounds very troubled - may be bipolar. If that is the case, there are meds, but she has to take them forever.

The best case scenario: Don't marry; see how it goes. Your wanting to run away is a wake-up call. Never ever ignore those wake-up calls. If you bury them in the sand, you will be miserable.


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They won't go away. I am going to have to agree with Lillietta. There is some baggage which is not as troublesome as other types of baggage.

The Conversation

I came into my marriage with little baggage whereas hubby had his fair share in addition to money issues. However, I decided early on when we were friends that he would be worth it to any girl since he was able to pick himself up from the ground when his marriage and post-marriag ended so miserably. I guess it depends on how strong your feelings are for this person and if you see the long road for both of you as treacherous and difficult or a little difficult but overall can be paved smoothly My first impression in response to your post was that same little warning signal that Lillietta mentioned regarding bipolar disorder.