But after Liam and I started dating, Emma became distant. Because I thought I ' d done everything right, I became indignant and angry about her treatment of me.
Questions From The Chase: I Want To Date My Ex-Boyfriend’s Friend
If she didn ' t want me to date him she should have just said so, right? I had no comprehension of the difficult position I put her in, and I didn ' t even try to be understanding about the fact that she felt I chose Liam over her. Our mutual anger and resentment towards each other led us to start talking less and less, until we eventually just stopped talking at all.
I had Liam, and I convinced myself that I was happy enough with that, but Emma had no one, and the isolated position I put her in upsets me to this day. After months of barely speaking to each other except when we were forced to, Emma and I were suddenly able to repair things. I missed my best friend. I missed our talks and our inside jokes and our sleepovers filled with laughter.
I wrote her a long note about all our memories and how much I missed her, and both of us were able to put our anger and resentment aside and continue our friendship. She got as on board as she could with Liam and my relationship, and I tried not to rub it in her face. But here ' s the real kicker: Liam and I eventually went through a very messy breakup and stopped talking or communicating all together.
It wasn ' t until we broke up that I realized what a colossal mistake I had made.
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Our relationship was never very healthy, and it hadn ' t lasted all that long in the grand scheme of things. I sacrificed months of laughter and memories with my best friend and caused her a lot of hurt and pain for a boy I would never talk to again. At the end of the day, I valued my temporary feelings for Liam over my relationship with my best friend… for what? A few months of fun memories with a boy that I would end up hating?
It was a terrible decision to make, and it didn ' t improve my life in any way, shape or form. The moral of the story is boys will come and go, but friends are forever. Your feelings for a boy will change over time and things might not work. Those are the times when you ' ll need your friends the most, and if you push them all away because you value your temporary feelings for a guy more than your besties, you ' re more likely to end up with nothing.
Even though it was a difficult lesson, I ' m glad I was able to learn early that friends should always come first. Another boy will come along eventually, but no one will ever be able to replace your BFF. It ' s tough to date in high school, but what if you aren ' t allowed to? Click HERE to see what to do when your parents say you ' re too young to date. No matter the reason, fighting with friends is never fun. Sex is all-powerful, and turning it down is very, very difficult to do. If a girl shows interest in hooking up with a guy, that guy is more than likely going to seize that opportunity.
If he finds out about it, he will more than likely hate your fucking guts and his friend for the rest of time.
And you can keep the fact that the two of you are hooking up a secret from your ex fairly easily. Hook up with this guy. Hook up with as many guys as you want. Idk if your advice to this girl necessarily falls into the latter part of that. Shoot your shot, shooter.
It kind of created a rift in their friend group that no one talked about but it was very clear that their friend group resented me and blamed me which only caused more tension.
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Another weird side effect is that when I did hang out w them and we were all drinking there were multiple occasions where one of them, despite making it clear that they did not like me, would be privately flirty or inappropriate as if they assumed I would just dick hop their friend group. It was all very weird and confusing and a constant pain point in an otherwise lovely relationship. I remember a girl who did this to two of my friends while the one went away to study abroad. They had a huge falling out that theyre just now getting over.
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And this girl did dick hop within the friend group while with the second guy. Archive Advertise with us. Columns Questions From The Chase: Read the last episode in the series.
Is It Ever OK To Date An Ex's Friend? | Ravishly
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